


The Slippery Slope

by FakePlastikTrees



Category: Damages, Devil Wears Prada (2006)
Genre: Damages/devil wears prada (2006) crossover, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-31
Updated: 2012-05-31
Packaged: 2017-11-06 10:37:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/417903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FakePlastikTrees/pseuds/FakePlastikTrees
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Patty Hewes and Miranda Priestley were best friends?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Slippery Slope

**Author's Note:**

> This is more like a handful of drabble-like things, based on a bunch of non-prompts psychrophile left in my ask box months ago. I had to write it.

**************************

 

 

"What if she hates me?" Andy asks again, looking herself over--for the fifteenth time this evening--in the mirror in Miranda's bedroom. Inspecting the flawless stitching of the fifteen hundred dollar Dolce dress Miranda purchased for her with a frown. It's a beautiful white, strapless floor length gown with a fitted bodice, a sweetheart neckline and more shoulder exposure than she's used to sporting, but it fits her like a glove--like Miranda said if would. her hair is swept back in soft waves--that and the bright red lip color make her look like a fifties bombshell. "Maybe I should change."

 

Miranda looks over from where she's been standing, picking out jewelry from a large selection laid out for her on her bed in a Dolce creation of her own, horrified, and exclaims quickly, "Don't you dare, Andrea." 

 

"I just--" Andy sighs, turning around, eyeing her backside with critique, "--I don't want her to think I'm your little plaything. I'm a serious journalist. I should look like one."

 

"You're also a beautiful woman--" Miranda replies, spotting a pair of emerald earrings, "--there's nothing wrong with you looking like one." 

 

"She's your best friend." Andy says, as if she hasn't heard a word Miranda has said. "I want her to like me." 

 

"Patricia doesn't like anybody." Miranda tells her young lover, and then laughs as Andy looks over and frowns worriedly. "She will adore you just as much as I do--well--hopefully, not as much as I do. Will you help me with this?" She asks, moving toward Andy with a diamond bracelet at hand. 

 

"Sure." 

 

Miranda's dress is black. A one shoulder, Grecian wrap that hugs her waist perfectly, only to fall off her hip in a beautiful sea of black fabric, with peaks of white, that makes her look like a goddess.

 

"You know, I just--" Andy begins again, turning to face the mirror as soon as she's fastened the clasp of Miranda's bracelet, to cup her breasts with both hands as she looks at her reflection, "--I've never been more aware of my breasts." 

 

Miranda's eyebrow lifts and she says, "Me either." She steps behind the younger woman to wrap her arms securely around her waist, propping her chin on her shoulder so that their eyes meet in the mirror. "You look beautiful. And Patricia will love you. Plus, I'm meeting her little--girlfriend for the first time, too. So if anything--whatever crap Patricia gives you, I'll give it right back to Ellen." 

 

Andy laughs, drops her hands off her breasts and turns her head toward Miranda, "You, be nice tonight. That girl and I are on the same boat tonight, I'm staying on her good side." 

 

"Traitor." Miranda scolds, and then drops a chaste kiss on Andy's lips before pulling away. 

 

"I wonder if she's as nervous as I am." Andy wonders aloud. 

 

*******************

 

"What if I don't like her?" Ellen asks, standing in front of the mirror, smoothing her palms over the gold Balenciaga gown she fell in love with the second she say it. It's long and sleek, with short sleeves and in the back, from shoulder to small of the back is beautiful embroidered lace that compliments Ellen's pale skin gorgeously. The neckline is modest and the waistline is snug. It reminds her of Grace Kelly. 

 

"You'll like her." Comes a muffled response from the bathroom, where Patty is still getting ready. 

 

"I heard horror stories about her." Ellen replies, pulling a single strand of hair back into place, and then placing her hands on her hips to eye her reflection, then, satisfied, she nods her head and turns towards her shoes, waiting for her at the foot of the bed.

 

"You've heard horror stories about me, too." Is Patty's response. 

 

Ellen smiles as she steps into her heels, "Well, those I like." 

 

"You'll like her." Patty repeats, sternly this time with an implied--but unspoken--'or else'.

 

"Wow." Ellen says as Patty makes her way out of the bathroom. The blonde looks stunning in green Versace. her arms are left bare, thanks to the modest straps, so is her back and just the right amount of cleavage. Patty's is in surprisingly great shape and Ellen loves any opportunity to see her girlfriend show that off in public events. The train is longer than Patty would usually wear. She complained that she couldn't breathe in the built in corset, but Ellen thinks Patty can handle a little breathlessness if only for Ellen's selfish ogling in case the night turns out to be boring. "You look amazing." She says. 

 

Patty smiles, tucking her hair behind her ear to put on her earring. "You look beautiful," She says, her eyes instantly growing weary when Ellen begins to slowly stalk forward with that familiar look in her eyes. "What are you doing?" Patty asks warningly. 

 

Ellen's smile broadens. One arm swiftly wraps around Patty's waist while she leans in and softly kisses the crook of the blonde's neck. Inhaling, she hums appreciatively, "You smell good." 

 

Patty sighs and closes her eyes in spite of herself, "We have to go soon, and I doubt this dress will zip up a second time." 

 

"That's a tempting thought." Ellen says, then reluctantly pulls back, but not before kissing Patty's lips once. "So tell me about the sex with this Miranda Priestley. Is she any good?" She says, sitting at the edge of the bed, then falling back to lounge comfortably, perched on her elbows as she watches Patty move around the room with familiarity. 

 

"There was no sex, I told you," Patty replies, picking up a necklace from her bureau. "It was a long time ago. Maybe...fifteen years ago. We were completely hammered, I brought her back to my place, we started fooling around, but it just wasn't doing anything for either one of us, so we decided to just be friends. And it's been that way ever since." 

 

"Hmm--" Ellen says, not completely convinced, "--if you say so."

 

"You will like her." Patty says sternly. 

 

"I'm not promising anything, but I'll give it a shot." Ellen replies carelessly. 

 

"Hey, I'm wearing this dress for you; do me this small favor--"

 

"I'm wearing this dress for YOU." Ellen says, "Or do you need me to remind you if the little incident in the dressing room?" 

 

Patty blushes at the not so distant memory of Ellen's muffled moans against her shoulder earlier in the week. "Point taken." 

 

"Thought so." Ellen retorts smugly, then softer than before, adds, "I'm sure I'll like her."

 

****************************************

 

_"She yelled at me."_

 

_Patty hands Miranda a glass of bourbon and stops momentarily to share a look of amusement with her best friend. "Wow." She says before taking a seat beside her. "New Emily has ovaries of steel, huh?"_

 

_"Apparently." Miranda replies, sipping her dripping slowly, then looking thoughtful for a moment, she looks over at Patty and says, "Her name is Andrea. She has the horrid habit of introducing herself as 'Andy'--Andrea is such a beautiful name, I just don't understand the need to take away from it that way. it's so tacky."_

 

_Patty glares "Thanks."_

 

_"What? You know I hate that you do that. Patricia is so much better than 'Patty'. You're the best litigator in New York City for goodness sake, own that."_

 

_"You're--ridiculous. You know that, right?"_

 

_"Oh, I'm ridiculous, am I?" Miranda counters, a smug smile displayed on her perfectly glossed lips, "You know what's ridiculous? Sleeping with your very attractive, very young, very untrusting Associate for six months now and not calling it what it is. That's ridiculous."_

 

_"You know--" Patty exclaims, waiving her glass in emphasis as she speaks, "--Yoda--it's complicated. At least, I'm getting laid. This is more than I can say for you."_

 

_"Who said I wasn't getting laid?" Miranda asks into her glass, eyes averted as she speaks._

 

_Patty seems amused and she tilts her chin upward, observing her friend with interest, "Wow...is this why we're calling her 'Andrea' now?"_

 

_"Perhaps--" Miranda replies, the sneaking smirk on her face betraying her coy intent to seem aloof._

 

_"Well. How is Andrea in bed?"_

 

_"I am not going to tell you--"_

 

_"You don't have to, that bite mark behind your ear says everything."_

 

_Miranda quickly adjusts her hair to cover the mark._

 

_"What are you, fifteen?" Patty says with a laugh, repeating the same remark she heard from Miranda three months previous when they had dinner one night and Miranda so disapprovingly pointed out a hickey peaking out of Patty's blouse. "So--" patty resumes, "--she finally talked back?"_

 

_Miranda looks up, her body responding almost too quickly at scene that took place not too long ago between her and Andy. Miranda had said something smarmy when Andy had announced she was leaving Runway and Andy had replied with equal sanctimoniousness. A shouting match neither expected proceeded and so their first sexual encounter took place late at night, in Miranda's office at Runway. Andy has long since left the company, but her late night visits to Miranda's home have become more frequent. "She finally talked back." Miranda replies, drinking a hefty amount of bourbon._

 

_"Well--" Patty says, pausing to take a sip of her own before continuing, "--yours inst the only brunette making some adjustments."_

 

_"Oh?"_

 

_"She has clothes here now. She actually stays the night." At Miranda's pleased hum of approval, Patty adds, "With a little luck, I can have her out of that claustrophobic little apartment of hers soon."_

 

_"Oh, good, Patricia! Now if you can go a few more months trying to kill each other, you'll be completely committed."_

 

_Patty stops short of a drink and glares up at Miranda,” That’s not very funny."_

 

_"It's sort of funny."_

 

***************************************

 

"My stomach is in knots, Miranda." Andy whispers in Miranda's ear before she hands the silver haired woman a martini.

 

"Andrea, please calm down."

 

"I can't." Andy fidgets in place for about five more seconds before leaning into Miranda and whispering again, "I'll be right back."

 

The Met Gala is something Andy will never get used to. Everyone is beautiful and perfect, and rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous does nothing for her except give her anxiety. It doesn't help that she is to meet Miranda's much mentioned best friend Patricia Hewes. And as Andy makes her way through designer gowns and suits and clouds of expensive perfume, she feels a bit dizzy. Because of course she's heard of Patty Hewes. Andy did go to law school after all. Anyone even considering the profession knows who Patty Hewes is.

 

Her reputation is impeccable, her record is flawless and she's been known to reduce grown men to infantile and tearful tantrums. Not to mention, the girlfriend, Ellen Parsons. Apparently, she's a force to be reckoned with and well on her way to become second, behind Patty, in her profession. Yeah, Andy is definitely experiencing a bad case of performance anxiety in anticipation of the dreaded meeting.

 

She pushes the door to the Ladies room and makes a beeline for the couch at the far end. A couch in the bathroom. If her parents could see her now.

 

Sighing, she throws her head back and closes her eyes. The even has only just begun and there is no one else here, she's glad. She gets lost in her own thoughts so quickly, that she doesn't hear the door open.

 

"Are you okay?" A soft, concerned voice asks.

 

"Yes, I'm fine." Andy replies without looking up, "Just having a mild panic attack, that's all. I'm--I'm fine, really." She mumbles.

 

Ellen smiles as she reaches the mirror, watching the young woman in her reflection. She's quite stunning, lounged back dramatically that way, looking a lot like Rita Hayworth. Ellen pauses and is almost positive she knows her from somewhere-- "Are you Andrea Sachs?"

 

Andy looks up slowly, "Yes..."

 

"Oh, wow, I read that piece you wrote on Michelle Obama last month, it was amazing!" 

 

With some difficulty and very little grace, Andy gets to her feet and approaches the other brunette with a smile, "Really? Thank you so much--"

 

"Oh, sorry, my name is Ellen Parsons." 

 

Andy's features completely freeze as they shake hands, and she can't help but laugh at the irony. "You're Ellen Parsons? Patricia's--I'm Andy!" She finally says.

 

"Andy--Andrea!" Ellen exclaims, "Miranda's--"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Yeah." 

 

They share a laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation and Ellen says, "I had no idea the Andrea Patty was talking about is Andrea Sachs. Wow, it's very nice to meet you." 

 

Andy breathes a sigh of relief and smiles graciously. "Awe, thank you so much. I've been--reading up on you as well, I have to admit. Very impressive." 

 

"Thank you." 

 

"I was very nervous to meet you. Well, Patricia more than anything, to be honest--"

 

Ellen smiles and can't help but feel a little bit proud, "Yeah, most people are, don't worry. She's pretty docile though, don't let her fool you."

 

"Did you need to use the restroom? I feel like I'm keeping you..."

 

"No-no--" Ellen replies, "--actually, this is kind of embarrassing, but do you think you could--the clasp on bra came undone. Do you mind?" 

 

"No, not at all!" Andy replies, waiting as Ellen unzips her dress enough for Andy to slip her hands inside it to reach to low clasp of the expensive piece of lingerie. Suddenly, she's back at Runway, dressing the models. Within seconds, she's done. "All set." She says, "How did that happen?" 

 

"Well--" Ellen shrugs and shares a knowing look with Andy as she zips back up, "--it was a long ride here." 

 

"Oh--" Andy laughs, then nods, "--traffic." 

 

"Traffic. Right." 

 

"We should probably get out there. I'm sure Miranda has found Patricia by now."

 

"Yeah. Can you do me a favor?" Ellen asks, holding the door open for Andy, "Can you keep calling Patty 'Patricia'?"

 

 

****************************

 

_"You named her Patricia." Patty states dryly, watching the--not so little--puppy run around the dog park with Cory._

 

_Miranda bites her cheek, fighting back the smile that is bound to betray her any time now. "She reminded me of you." She says._

 

_"You named her--PATRICIA." Patty repeats, nearly gawking at her best friend now from behind the dark tint of her sunglasses._

 

_"The girls loved the name, I can't change it now." Miranda says slowly, as if it's the most logical explanation, then adds as she nods in the puppy's direction. "Look how adorable she is."_

 

_"Is this your way of telling me you think I'm a bitch?"_

 

_"Not at all."_

 

_"I loathe you." Patty states plainly. "You do know that, right?"_

 

_"I beg to differ." Miranda says with a small shrug._

 

 

****************

 

"So, what do you think?" Patty asks, a second glass of bourbon in her hand.

 

Miranda gives Patty that once over with that perfected judging scanner like motion and nods her approval. "Beautiful dress. Lovely color. It compliments you very nicely." 

 

Patty rolls her eyes, "Not the dress. Ellen. But thank you." 

 

"Well, I don't know," Miranda replies, "It seems as though Andrea might actually leave me for her." 

 

Across the room, Andy and Ellen are lost in conversation, laughing uncontrollably, but once in a while getting a word in. 

 

"I'm sure she's lovely--" Miranda adds, "--but I can't get a word in, so I cannot make a judgment as of yet." 

 

Sighing, Patty shakes her head, kissing any chance of leaving early goodbye. Suddenly remembering something, she turns toward Miranda, "Donatella came up to me earlier to say hi. She sends her love."

 

Rolling her eyes, Miranda gives a little groan of annoyance and looks over at Patty. "I'm sure she did. God, the woman is insufferable." 

 

**********************

 

"Andy went to law school, did you know that?"

 

"Hmm--" Is Patty's feeble attempt at a reply, as her mouth is currently occupied with Ellen's neck.

 

"--but, she decided she wanted to be a journalist instead. I wanted to be a journalist in high school."

 

"What a peculiar coincidence--" Patty says, humoring her momentarily before trying again.

 

"We should invite them over for dinner--"

 

Patty sighs and gives up the chase turning to sit upright in her side of the backseat, while the stretch limo barely moves in the expected backed up traffic.

 

Ellen looks over shortly thereafter and asks, "Why'd you stop?"

 

"Oh, I'm sorry, did you suddenly remember that I'm here?" Patty indignantly states.

 

"Oh, I know you're here--" Ellen replies, seductively scooting closer to the blonde, her gaze dropping instantly into the swell of her breasts perfectly showcases in the green dress, "--I've been trying very hard all night not to notice just how very 'here' you are." She nearly purrs the last couple of words into Patty's ear before her tongue darts out and the younger woman is quickly reminded of just how sensitive Patty's ears are.

 

 

***********

 

Andy and Miranda collapse simultaneously on their respective pillows, breathless and sated, their dresses more than a little out of place.

 

But just as Miranda is about to suggest another round, Andy opens her mouth again. "I really like Ellen."

 

Sighing heavily, Miranda closes her eyes and dreads the outcome of this fruitful new friendship. She and Patricia will never hear the end of this, but at least, Miranda's beloved Andrea will hopefully stop this ongoing friendship with Miranda's employees. She strongly dislikes that they use the young woman to accommodate their days by suggesting Andy will perform certain--favors--to keep their boss somewhat more easy to handle.

 

At any rate, Miranda makes a mental note to call Patricia later to strategize a plan to keep this all under control.

 

Little does Miranda know, Ellen doesn't take well to being "controlled". And Patty reaps all the benefits.

 

END

 


End file.
